ICV Christmas Classics
by Ice Cream Vendors
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Digital Album
Immediate download of 4-track album in your choice of MP3 320, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.Free Download
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Not A Hat Like That
05:14
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Santa Clumsy Santa
03:12
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about
Written and performed by Jon Kostal and Greg Barnett. From the ICV Archives. Originally released on the Cassette series Christmas Grooves by Kostal Studios, 60559.
credits
released 01 November 2010
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license
All rights reserved
feeds
Feeds for about
The Ice Cream Vendors (ICV), made up of longtime pals Jon Kostal and Greg Barnett, is not just a musical duo but a ... more mysterious life force. Those familiar with Jon and Greg know that boy meets girl lyrics and verse/verse/chorus clichés are simply not in their genetic makeup. Defying classification, ICV examines its subjects through a sometimes-surreal lens, but always with fondness and curiosity. less
discography
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Dec 2011 -
Oct 2011 -
Nov 2010 -
Oct 2010 -
Apr 2010 -
May 1994
contact / help
For help with downloads, click here.
For all other inquiries, including help with merch, click here.
- Track Name: Not A Hat Like That
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All I ever wanted for Christmas
was a straw hat to cover my head (with little frillies on the side)
All I ever wanted for Christmas
was a straw hat to cover my head (with a flower on the top)
I don't care for anything extraneous
just a hat to keep my head out of the rain
You can have a tall hat, a small hat, a fat hat, a skinny hat
You can have have any kind of hat you want
But not like that
When you wear a hat with frillies on the back, you look like a girl!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Don't wear a hat like that
Don't wear a hat like that
Don't wear a hat like that
Don't wear a hat like that
Why does no one believe in me?
This hat of mine is no fantasy
Everyone scorns what they
can't believe
This man on the street goes off and yells at me
for looking at silly hats in a window
What right has he to wreck me dreams?
"Oh but not a hat like that"
Hey there little boy. Hi.
You like hats? Yes.
Do you like Straw? Oh yes!
I'll sell one to you. For how much?
Only about sixty dollars. Oh that's all my allowance. Here you go.
I can't believe it's true. I've found a hat of straw for me and you!
I can't believe I've got this hat
it's sitting in my hands
I paid my fee of sixty bucks
Well ain't that grand?
I'll be the envy of the town
When I wear my hat around
You'll see my on the street and say "Hey,
that hat is really neat."
Hey there little boy
What's that on your head?
It's a straw hat
You're dead!
Last night at the station
someone reported a hat of straw
Don't you know that stealing, little boy
means you're breaking the law?
But I bought it from a vendor
who was selling on the street
He said he had a license
Should I know that he's a cheat?
I'm sorry little boy but
It's that hat I'll confiscate
It's incriminating evidence
the judge will need to throw you away!
All I ever wanted for Christmas
was a straw hat to cover my head (with little frillies on the back and a nice daisy) - Track Name: Santa Clumsy Santa
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When Santa came down my chimney
he didn't know it was lit
And when he touched the fire
he screamed out loud oh
Oh when he came out of the chimney
his suit was burnt and black
My Daddy thought he was a burglar
And he hit him with a bat and he said
Ow
Santa Clumsy Santa
Where do you come from?
Santa Clumsy Santa
Why are you so dumb?
You are so dumb
He found the milk and cookies
It was two-percent low fat
And while he was a-dunkin'
He sat right on my cat
Looking for the Christmas tree
His presents in his sack
He tripped on my nintendo
And landed on his back
He hurt his back
Santa Clumsy Santa
Where do you come from?
Santa Clumsy Santa
Why are you so dumb?
You are so dumb
When he found the Christmas tree
He saw an open door
When he went to shut it
He heard a mighty Roar
Investigating further
He looked down at his feet
And found out he had turned our dog
Into a pile of meat
Big pile of Meat
Santa Clumsy Santa
Where do you come from?
Santa Clumsy Santa
Why are you so dumb?
You are so dumb
After he put the presents
underneath our Christmas Tree
He began to walk away
and bumped right into me
I helped him up and said
"Hey Santa, just go out the door!"
Now that I have helped him so
He is clumsy no more
He is not dumb
Santa is not clumsy
He comes from the north pole
Santa is not clumsy
His reindeer fell in a hole
and he says Ho Ho Ho - Track Name: Ricki-Ticki Christmas Bunny
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Ricki-Ticki Christmas Bunny
make me laugh cause your so funny
Ricki-Ticki The Christmas Bunny
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha - Track Name: Christmas Chicken Sandwich
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I eat a chicken sandwich, a Christmas chicken sandwich
It tastes like a Christmas tree
and when I'm feeling happy, or maybe kind of sappy
it reminds me of Christmas eve
One day I was hungry so I went to eat lunch
at the Oak Brook shopping mall
Ordered chicken sandwich, It was really puny
I looked at her and said "zat all?"
Looking for a table, sat down at this table
a napkin in my lap
When I went to bite it, I didn't try to hide it
dripping out of it came sap
Right after I ate it is when I really felt it
a pine needle in my tongue
I was feeling sappy but now I'm really happy
Gee isn't Christmas fun?
I eat a chicken sandwich, a Christmas chicken sandwich
It tastes like a Christmas tree
and when I'm feeling happy, or maybe kind of sappy
it reminds me of Christmas eve
One day I went sledding, crashed into a big tree
Smacked me in the head ow ow
I went into a coma, I didn't know what happened
For all I knew I was dead
Next I heard was cheering but I was feeling weary
I asked what was the date.
It was January, the first day of the year
for Christmas, I'm too late
I eat a chicken sandwich, a Christmas chicken sandwich
It tastes like a Christmas tree
and when I'm feeling happy, or maybe kind of sappy
it reminds me of Christmas eve
Christmas is all over, I can't believe I missed it
It's my favorite time of the year
So I eat this chicken sandwich, this Christmas chicken sandwich
and Christmastime sure seems near
I ride a flying toaster faster than a roller coaster
visiting the North Pole
Because I want to visit, who do I want to visit?
I will tell you now:
Santa Clumsy Santa
Where do you come from?
Santa Clumsy Santa
Why are you so dumb? You are so dumb
We eat a chicken sandwich, a Christmas chicken sandwich
It tastes like a Christmas tree
and when I'm feeling happy, or maybe kind of sappy
it reminds me of Christmas eve
